Back to School as a Stay-at-Home Mom: What Was I Thinking?!

There’s nothing quite like chasing a toddler with one hand while submitting a discussion post with the other to make you question all your life choices.

I’m kidding. Kind of.

Going back to school as a stay-at-home mom is not for the faint of heart. It’s stretching, humbling, empowering, and exhausting—usually all in the same day. I used to think I couldn’t possibly add anything else to my plate. And then I enrolled in school again. Because apparently I thrive in chaos (or at least I like to think I do).

But here’s the real reason I decided to go back: I wanted to grow. Not just for my kids, or my future career, or even to finish something I started (though those are part of it). I did it because I needed to prove to myself that the version of me who has been wiping noses and making snacks for the last few years still had dreams. Still had ideas. Still had something to say.

And here’s what I’ve learned along the way:

1. You’re Going to Feel Like You’re Failing at Everything Some Days

Let’s just be honest: being a mom already comes with enough guilt. Add in school deadlines, discussion boards, and group projects? The mental load can get heavy, fast.

Some days I’m convinced I’m not doing anything well. I’m snapping at my kids, scrambling to submit an assignment, forgetting to defrost the chicken, and wearing a shirt that’s questionably clean.

But here’s the thing I’m learning—those messy, disheveled, not-my-best days? They don’t define me. They’re just days.

No one is doing this perfectly. Most of us are just doing our best with what we have, right in the thick of the chaos. You are not a failure. You’re a mom showing up in a hundred invisible ways—and now you’re also showing up for yourself. That’s strength, not failure.

2. Naptime is Now Prime Time

Remember when naptime used to be sacred? A little window of quiet to scroll, snack, maybe sit still for a second?

Now it’s a race. As soon as that nap hits, I’m logging in, pulling up modules, writing papers, answering questions like a woman on a mission—because I am.

It’s not glamorous. Half the time I’m sitting cross-legged on my bed with a laptop and a lukewarm coffee, telling myself, “Just write one more paragraph.” And sometimes? The baby wakes up early, and that’s that. I’ve learned to be okay with imperfect productivity.

But I will say this: I’ve never valued time more. I may not get hours of uninterrupted quiet, but I’ve learned how to be intentional with the time I do have. That alone has changed me.

3. Your Kids Are Watching You Chase a Goal

This one hits me right in the heart. Because yes, I’m doing this for me—but I’m also doing it for them.

I want my kids to see that growing and learning don’t stop when you become a mom. That you can be fully present for your family and still have goals. That even when it’s hard, you keep showing up for the things that matter to you.

Some days they sit in my lap while I read a textbook. Some days they color next to me while I type. They may not understand it all right now, but they’re witnessing something important—resilience, dedication, and self-worth.

And one day, I hope they’ll look back and say, “Mom didn’t give up on her dreams—and I don’t have to either.”

4. Community Is Everything

It is so easy to feel isolated doing this. Friends without kids may not understand why you’re too tired to hang out, and mom friends who aren’t in school may not know the added mental load you’re carrying. You’re stuck somewhere in between—and that can feel lonely.

That’s why having a community is everything. Even just one person who checks in on you, cheers you on, or sends a “You’ve got this, Mama” text can make a world of difference.

I’ve found comfort in online groups, classmates who are also moms, and real-life friends who get it. I’ve had people pray for me, bring me coffee, and talk me off the ledge when I wanted to drop out.

Find your people. Let them in. You don’t have to do this alone.

5. You Are Allowed to Want Something For You

I’ll be honest—I wrestled with this one. For a long time, I felt guilty for wanting to go back to school. Was I being selfish? Was it fair to my kids? Was I asking too much of myself and my family?

But here’s what I’ve come to believe: motherhood doesn’t mean we stop becoming.

We’re allowed to have dreams outside of the home. We’re allowed to want to grow intellectually, creatively, professionally. That doesn’t make us bad moms—it makes us whole humans.

You can pour into your kids and still chase a goal. You can love your family deeply and still have a vision for your own future.

There’s space for both. There has to be.

So, yes. Going back to school while being a stay-at-home mom is hard. Like, really hard.

But it’s also meaningful. It’s stretching me in ways I didn’t know I needed. It’s reminding me that God is not done with my story. That growth can happen in the middle of diapers and dishes and deadlines.

And maybe it’s reminding you, too.

So if you’re in the middle of this journey, or just thinking about it—I see you. You’re doing something brave. Something beautiful. Something that’s building a legacy.

And I’m cheering you on every step of the way.

Now if you’ll excuse me, I have a paper to write, a toddler climbing on my back, and a microwave beep reminding me I forgot my coffee. Again.